Divorce & Difficult Decisions: How to Cope
When you go through a major life change, like a divorce, it has a ripple effect that impacts many other aspects of your life. It’s no secret that the divorce process is hard on most people, but regardless of those difficulties, it is important to stay level-headed to make the necessary emotional, financial, and parenting decisions that may affect your life years into the future.
If you are going through a divorce, take stock of your situation and consider the following tips to ensure you are making sensible decisions for yourself and your family.
Keep Your Emotions in Check
After deciding to divorce, you may feel overwhelmed, confused, angry, sad, free, or any number of other emotions. For most people, their response is a combination of contradictory feelings. It is important to remember that this huge swell of emotion is something everyone goes through. However, overcoming these emotions and knowing when to keep them in check can greatly improve your decision-making abilities. Making life-changing choices regarding child custody, property division, or spousal support based on your feelings in the moment could negatively affect your future.
Try to remain rational and step back from each decision, pushing aside your emotional response to evaluate the choice for what it is. Remember, the agreements you and your spouse reach during your divorce will affect your family for years to come, so be smart.
Besides keeping yourself disciplined, you may also consider different ways you and your spouse might legally handle your divorce. You will have many difficult decisions to make, but there are options that might make the entire process easier on both of you.
Mediation is a great alternative to litigation for couples who wish to avoid going to court in favor of a more private arrangement. If you and your spouse think you would be able to talk through most of your decisions peacefully, with the help of a third-party mediator, this course of action could make the process quicker, more affordable, and less stressful.
Maintain Your Privacy
While you and your spouse navigate your divorce together and independently, your discretion regarding the process will greatly help. For one, staying away from social media to vent is absolutely crucial. Not only could the things said and posted on social media sites be used against you in court, it could also inflame your situation and create hostile issues. Instead, keep these opinions to yourself or talk to a trusted friend or family member about your frustrations.
Put Your Children First
If you have children, you’re likely already thinking about the impact your divorce will have on them. Typically, when you make decisions in your children’s best interest, you are making a good decision.
Also, keeping the issues of your divorce between yourself and your spouse can make the process much easier on them. Remind your children how loved they are and do what you can to see that you and your spouse each spend plenty of time with your children, if possible, ensuring they maintain strong relationships with both parents. Airing out the private aspects of your divorce in front of your children or speaking badly about your spouse in front of them will only add more stress to an already tense situation, and could have legal repercussions.
No matter how you look at it, divorce is hard. Everyone copes with divorce differently, and every couple has their own unique relationship, which often determines the course of the divorce. When dealing with difficult decisions, having a legal advisor on your side can make a huge difference. Whether you resolve your issues through negotiation, mediation, or going to court, your divorce lawyer will advocate for your rights and take some of the pressure off your shoulders. Whatever your needs may be, we are confident our team at McKinley Irvin can help.Contact McKinley Irvin in Oregon for legal help regarding your divorce.